What Is Tantric Sex?

Most people I work with want to know what Tantric sex is. These two buzz words have become one of  "the most sought for" and "the most misunderstood" terms in practicality.

Every tantric masseuse has a story to tell. Still... nothing makes sense and we  are all more confuse then ever... so is anyone out there that can summarise what "tantric love making" means? so an 8 year old could understand it too??

The first myth that has to go is that Tantric sex is about having intercourse for hours. A comment that Sting made over 20 years ago has captivated the public's imagination. He tried to re-phrase it after and at some point he even said he regretted making that statement as everyone misunderstood him.

In Tantric love making, both partners transfigured each other. They are no longer "him and her" but deities beyond human faults. Shiva and Shakti are dancing together to maintain harmony in this Universe. The Tantric approach is a mental approach and has little to do with technique. Suffice it to say that boosting your ego about your own performance has nothing to do with Tantra. On the contrary, this will keep you down.

Maintaining a state of arousal for longer helps. There is no such  thing like: I'll kiss you, and I'll do this to you and then you'll do the same to me and hopefully we'll be both happy with what we've got by the time we finish. Giving just for the sake of giving, no expectations to get anything back. Receiving everything, staying open, going beyond your limitations... surrender.... A few key words here that indicate a state of mind. Starting from giving-receiving, the ego looses the battle. The state of consciousness changes and love making becomes a  transcendental metha-physical experience. It's not just about the body, it's about the journey that the mind takes you on.

Two minds can become one and travel together to discover the beauty of the non dual awareness. Bon voyage and enjoy!

One Month Intensive Tantra Yoga Course In Mexico

Part of the Agama Yoga school ( www.agamayoga.com), a new Tantra Yoga course has opened for more than a year now in Mazunte - Oaxaca, Mexico. It has quickly become one of Mexico's favourite stops for affordable courses like First Month Intensive Yoga Course and The Hridaya Silent Meditation Retreat.

For all info on courses, workshops and retreats, please visit http://hridaya-yoga.com/

The Ella Experience, www ellaxp.com

The Yoni Massage - What Does It Do To Women?

The counterpart of the Lingham Massage is the Yoni massage. It is often offered in a Tantric massage place/temple for women by women. If you are already thinking about two naked women massaging each other....let me stop you here!

Women choose to go for a Yoni massage:
a) out of curiosity, they have probably read about it in a fancy magazine;
b) because they feel they are missing out on something here (they might not be able to have an orgasm and talking about it with a woman might be easier for them);
c) they want to experience a woman's touch.

A Yoni massage is designed for women by women. A full body massage to start with ensures that the recipient is more relaxed and can open her body to receive the Yoni massage. It can be an intense, emotional experience, where the client remains passive and is deeply connected to herself, her mind remains still.

The Yoni massage can clear sexual blockages (if any) and increases the recipient's sexual confidence. Her sacred space is worshipped by her through the giver's mind, hands and intention. there is no rush and each woman reacts differently. Some perceive it as a nice relaxing experience, others as a breakthrough into their fears, traumas and emotional insecurities.

Whatever the issue you want to experience a Yoni Massage for, talk to the therapist prior to session. Every woman is different and should be treated as such.

Benefits Of Orgasm For Men And Women

Women are multi-orgasmic by nature while men have to learn how to build and surf on that continuous wave without exploding. Women need more time to find an orgasm, men are pressured by time. Women are greedy, they want another one, and then another one, while most men are happy with one orgasm.

It seems we all want the same thing: whether we call it sex or love making, everyone wants their emotional and physical needs met. The rest is just linguistics. Whether we are able to express our feelings through words, the way we feel after a close intimate contact is about the same. We feel loved, taken care of and sometimes even spoilt!

Orgasms make us happy and they put us into a deep state of relaxation, we can fall asleep straight through after, or relax easier after a stressful day - cortisol (the stress hormone) has left the body, and new endorphins have been released.

Frequent orgasms can make you look 10 years younger. If you have ever bumped into somebody whom you haven't met recently and he/she looks younger, feels more vital and looks happier,  no need to ask them why and how. You can though... to check if the theory is true. Be my guest!

Whether in a relationship or not, we can all have orgasms. Of course, "a dildo doesn't bring you flowers and you can't introduce it to your parents" (Sex And The City). If it works for you, (or your hands are enough), the endorphin rush is enough to calm the nerves. Plus your skin will glow (not in the dark though!).

The Ella Experience - www.ellaxp.com

How To Use All Five Senses To Get Her In The Mood

Attention men everywhere! If you want to rev things up between-the-sheets with your partner, let your five senses control foreplay! It doesn't necessarily have to be a sensual massage... keep it nice and simple!

Turn her on with your words, beckon her with your smell and sexplore with taste. Voila, you've discovered the secret to mind blowing fun! Allow Esther Perel to explain:

Can We Want What We Already Have?

In a relationship, after years of living together, can we still want what we already have? When we are so sure that everything will be the same tomorrow - simply a routine - does our partner still attract us?

A long term relationship offers the greatest luxury in life: enough time to spend with each other. There are exciting times, and others that feel like a failure. It requires strategy, effort, and a will to make it work to stay together... a relationship needs maintenance. Blaming the other for routine will only cause a defensive argument, to say at least...

To keep it all exciting, maintain a sense of playfulness. "Sex is the last arena where we can afford to get back to playing as adults." (Esther Perel) You don't have to go places, it's enough if you look at each other with new eyes. Desire needs imagination, thrill needs adventure, and safety needs emotional intimacy.

When you are sure something will be yours forever, you rapidly loose interest... Only fear of  loss can make you appreciate your partner again.

Here is one of Esther Perel's  amazing TED video presentation that reveals the secret to desire in a long term relationship. She is one of the world's most original and insightful voices on couples and sexuality across cultures.

The Ella Experience - New Video Release

Ella (The Ella Experience) shares a love for Tantra and a taste for simplicity with the people she meets through her work. It's a love story between real life and faith. Everything is perfect as it is and each Tantric massage session she gives, is different in terms of energy flow, interpretation of the human body and emotional connection.

After 6 years of working in London with people from all over the world, Ella has made a video that lets you into her world. The camera follows her hands moving smoothly - it's the mellow warmth of the Far East, where Tantra was born. Making the video was just like writing about herself... her emotions translated into motions.